Impressions
by LadyMononoke756
Summary: Neji.There were plenty of other guys I could have liked, guys people expected me to like, but it didn’t happen that way…and I have no idea why… NejixTenten[Tenten's POV, stand alone prelude to Renegade Lilly]
1. Prologue

**Author Note: This one is actually based on my life at the moment, in almost the exact context. One shot unless anyone asks for more...doubt u will...**

**Disclaimer: Obviously, I don't own Naruto, but I do own this story so, keep from taking it 'kay :0) -- (or else you may meet a sad sad fate with many rabid squirrels involved...)**

Neji looked at me emotionlessly from a few yards away but I suspect he was disgusted. It had been two weeks and I still wasn't able to land the tornado jump-kick he had shown me. Actually, it had been a lot longer but I was lucky he didn't know it. I had actually first seen Neji practicing the combination a year ago but I still hadn't been able to get it right after all my private practice, I was just thankful Neji didn't know how much of a failure I really was. Spins, and flips, aren't my thing; I can jump and kick as well as anybody but there is a reason I am a weapons specialist after all.

I got up and brushed myself off.

For as long as I have been training in ninja arts I have been better than any of the kunoichi in my class and some of the shinobi but I always fell short at complicated jumps. I could execute all of the standard offensive jump kicks and two of the higher level jump spins but nothing more complicated than that and I was always painfully aware of exactly how much better Neji was than me and how he always seemed to be watching when I messed up.

If I had to pin point the moment when I first started liking him, I wouldn't be able to do it but I know that I admired him before I liked him and wanted to impress him because he himself was so impressive.

He was a prodigy recognized from the age of five and all his teachers made a special effort to mold him and perfect him. He's never been especially attractive and I don't think he is, but he's beautiful in a way, and I'm reminded of that every time I watch him fight.

I don't even know if we'd get along because he's never really talked to me unless it's to answer a question I ask first, and even then, it's only happened twice.

I remember joking with Minami once about random holidays right before she left on a trip to visit relative in the Rice Country and saying something like, "great! Then you'll be here for Saturday." Right then Neji walked by and he asked me what was happening on Saturday and I didn't have the sense to tell him "nothing!" So I said "international youth day" instead with a stupid smile and he just stared at me for a second and walked away slowly. Every time I think about that I want to slap myself in the forehead.

Fabulous, he thinks I'm a weirdo and he knows I'm incompetent…but of course that's not the end. He's seen me cry too, in the middle of a test. It was the midterm exam for taijutsu and I messed up my form halfway through the second section and bowed out before I had finished. I sat down in one of the corners, hugged my knees to my chest and cried as quietly as I could manage. Neji had finished already and passed with flying colors—he spent all of two seconds disinterestedly looking in my direction; and when he looked away I couldn't tell if he was more revolted or bored.

There were plenty of other guys I could have liked, guys people expected me to like. Hiroshi and Ryoku for instance. Lots of girls thought they were hot and they were my best friends, we hung out and trained together all the time. I could have liked Takashi too, we weren't that close to each other but he was hilarious and we always made each other laugh. Everyone expected me to eventually go out with one of them, I almost expected myself to go out with one of them but it didn't happen…and I have no idea why…

I went into a preparation stance again and landed the first part of the combination easily, only to mess up the jump spin.

"As expected…"he stated quietly under his breath.

Picked my self off the ground. Great.


	2. Monday

**Author Note: I'm shocked anyone liked it but I did say I'd post more if you asked…so here, I hope you enjoy it—it actually has a plot plan this time! **

**Disclaimer: Naruto, me, blah blah blah, Masashi Kishimoto.**

I was too revolted by myself to sigh. Some people can look beautiful and cry, but I'm not one of those people so I've long since developed a habit of spreading my hand in a claw like shape to cover the lower half of my face which tends to look the most horrible. I walked my self off the training floor but Anko-sensei stopped me mid-way out of the room. "It's fine," she motioned to the only other person still on the floor practicing, "Neji doesn't know it either…just go home and memorize the first part of it," she said waving it off dismissively, "you can come earlier Wednesday to learn the next part." Neji heard his name and spared me a parting look. I'm pretty sure he was sickened I'd cry. How was I ever going to be kunoichi if I cried over things like this?

"Yes, thank you sensei." I bowed. "I'm sorry."

Contrary to what you might believe and what you may have been told about Anko-sensei being borderline psychotic, she's actually a pretty sane and kind person (which is how she got anywhere near a teaching job)—when she's not training you. When she's training you she's an absolute despot and she will pound you into the ground and work you till you drop. I'm pretty sure that's why the Hokage has put her in charge of Demo every year since she was a chuunin.

Demo happens once annually and it's the most important thing that can happen for an academy student. It's a performance-demonstration by a hand picked group of academy students for daimyo and kages of countries and villages the leaf is allayed to. The event is flawless—_flawless—_it has to be to make sure that we maintain our regional influence by showing how strong our students are, and it's different every year. Which means, one week before it happens the teachers suddenly remember to tell us about it and everything is chaos as we attempt (and usually succeed) to put together an impossible amount of new forms and fight sets in one day which have to be learned and memorized in three days then executed in perfect synchronism.

It was both my good and bad fortune to be one of Anko-sensei's favorites, the others being Mameha, Lee and Neji. (Everybody loves the prodigy.) Only the best and most impressive students are selected for demo; for some unfathomable reason Anko-sensei asked me—along with all the most amazing genin the academy has had since her class graduated. The conversation actually went something like this:

Anko: Tenten, how was your Christmas break?

Me: Oh, it was fine, a little weird though since my family came over for lunch instead of dinner. (I smile sheepishly.)

Anko: Can you cook?

Me: Only a few things.

Anko: Oh. So…you gonna be here on the thirtieth?

Me: Yes, why?

Anko: You wanna be part of the Demo team?

Me: (stunned silence)

Then I finally said yes. Stupid, stupid response! I cannot believe I thought for a second I was on par with the likes of Neji, Buka, Takashi, Hiroshi, Ryoku, Tashi, Mameha, Hana and Shuske. Unlike them, I hadn't been training since birth, and I wasn't from a traditionally shinobi family with clan specific jutsu or a bloodline limit. I became a kunoichi just three years ago, most people thought I was too old and honestly I agreed and I'm shocked I made it this far. Neji, Buka, and Shuske are so talented they have been chosen for as long as they have been at the academy and the others had been chosen a few times already too; but this was the first time I'd ever been chosen to do this—and I had no idea what I was suppose to do.

The first practice, I walked in and everyone was on the floor at the same time practicing. It was pretty intimidating. Buka was going through her Jonin level jian form, Neji projected chakra streams while doing eight trigrams sixty-four palms, Hana worked on tetra-piercing fang while in her double headed wolf form, Mameha practiced a high level staff sequence, and Shuske was breaking out into Ariel twists and 1080 degree flips in the air over all of them along with Ryoku. Anko walked in followed by the rest of the Demo team and started grouping people for different forms.

I was sorted into the sword, pole arm and taijutsu groups. I memorized the weapons forms and fight sets by the time we had stopped changing them and put them together but I couldn't remember the taijutsu no matter how many times I did it.

Anko-sensei kept changing things so the form got longer and more and more complicated. I tried looking around at other people and following Hiroshi but I was slower than him and the movements didn't stick. My timing was off, I kicked at the wrong times and I didn't land my spins. We redid the form at least twelve times because of me. Everyone was tired but Anko-sensei insisted we do it till I got it right and we were all moving together.

After the fifteenth time Takashi took me aside and tried to teach it to me individually. "Look, we've all done this form before from the last Demo, so it's not your fault," he told me, "we're just to lazy to come up with an entirely new form this year." At this point, even that didn't save me from feeling like a complete moron. "And no one ever remembers when they're watching," he finished, trying to assure me. I still wish we had come up with a new form, at least if we had made up another one there would be someone struggling with me so I didn't feel like an idiot by myself.

Takashi is a great friend and I know I'm a frustrating student but I hope he never becomes a teacher. He gave up in just a few minutes and tried to get me to fake the form acceptably instead. I couldn't even fake it and I just got more confused because he stopped correcting me and told me everything was right. He told me I'd figure it out and didn't correct me as long as I did something that resembled the right move. Like hell I could figure it out! He left and I kept practicing the same incorrect movements in the wrong order for ten minutes before I asked Hana to help me and found out Takashi was being a butt.

Hana explained it better but she showed me the whole thing at once and I barely caught any of it. She patiently walked me through the first half of it a few times but then she had to go too and I still didn't get it. The only person still in the training room who knew the form was Buka and she was teaching it to Neji because Anko-sensei had suddenly decided he should be in the regular taijutsu group too.

Neji got the gist of it minutes. Unfortunately, he stayed in the room and kept practicing and training while Buka tried to teach it too me. Every time I remember what happened next I want to smack myself. I still couldn't get it after half an hour and I just sat down and cried.

"I'm sorry I took up so much of your time Buka."

Thank God I remembered to thank her before I broke down completely. "Thank you so much!" I bowed and started to run out of the class room before Anko-sensei stopped me, as I've already said. Wednesday was going to be a long day. A really really really long day.


	3. Tuesday

**Author Note: Long belated posting, this is a peak into Tenten's daily life, more plot development next time, I swear!**

**Disclaimer: see previous…**

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As the last class ended, I wiped off sweat on my sleeve and raced out of the training gym to grab my things from the locker room. The last period of the day just _had_ to be taijutsu sparring to make my day complete. In the changing area, I ducked as another girl grabbed something from the shelf above me and dodged some random flying equipment before I made it out of the room.

Before Wednesday, obviously there was Tuesday, so lucky for me I had an entire other day to wallow in my inadequacy and bug people about attempting to learn something. Except, I happen to have to go to the library for two hours every Tuesday to help with peer tutoring. Why I do this, I don't know but it's just one of four extracurricular activities, so I didn't really have enough time to practice for Demo or try to piece the form together anyway.

To become a peer tutor you have to be recommended by your teachers and maintain scores within the top ten rankings in your class, so if you drop out of the program it's really noticeable and everybody knows why, or assumes they know. In addition, all the kids you help out have to maintain a grade of passing in the subjects you help them in and the teacher who recommends you has to evaluate your teaching. So guess who I was getting examined by every week. Anko-sensei. Then of course, there was the fact that one of my students was Hinata, Neji's cousin—who I really didn't want to go home and tell Neji how inept I was at teaching.

I sprinted down the hallway all the way to the other end of the campus, dragging along books, weapons and other school supplies. I happened to stuff everything in long handled mini-messenger bags so all the bags flew in different directions in my wake as I ran and I looked like a maniac trying to fly weighted kites indoors. Needless to say, I was definitely a hallway safety hazard to on coming traffic.

One of the first things anybody learns when they come to academy is the art of dodging Tenten on Tuesdays, (even if you're an instructor) and they learn it fast, because I _will_ run you over if you don't flatten yourself against wall and you _will_ get smacked by a passing bag if you don't jump out of the way into a neighboring hallway. The library is the furthest room from our usual taijutsu gym and the only safe thing about it is that the path from our gym to the library is pretty much a straight shot so pedestrians always have a means to get out of the way.

I got there in time, as always, but with only a couple minutes to spare. I dumped all my things on my usual chair, snatched my change of clothes and ducked into the restroom. In the two minutes I had before it started there wasn't time to shower so I just washed my face, dried myself off, threw on a fresh set of clothes and re-coiled my hair.

I always feel so conspicuous just after my last class, I feel like I sweat so much more than all the other kunoichi and everyone is staring at me. Some girls can get away with just doing the bare minimum and never sweat at all but I can't stand it. It's impossible for me not to try. I tell myself at the beginning of every sparring class not to over exert myself but it never works; I always end up sparring just as hard or harder the guys. It's just not fair, I mean Hana and Mameha work just as hard but they sweat half as much as me.

I took a look in the mirror and brushed a hair out of my face then left and slipped back into the library hopping that I looked somewhat more composed.

There were a few academy students gathered around my chair expectantly. I smiled and led them to the target area just outside the library to get them started on a warm up exercise for kunai throwing. They were all girls and only a year younger than me, Sakura, Ino, and Hinata. Ino didn't really need any help, it seemed she was mostly there to provide moral support for her friend Sakura. Sakura wasn't bad enough at any of her subjects to have to worry about passing, actually, she was doing fairly well, but she was always unconvinced of it. Finally, there was Hinata, her scholastic academics were fine and she was passing in all of her other classes but the girl could not handle weapons to save her life. I tried my best to be patient and gentle but no matter what I did Hinata would stutter nervously, avert her eyes from me and totally miss my corrections.

I got the nerve to ask Neji what to do about her once but he told me to leave her to flail and figure it out on her own and stared off into the distance coldly. He was probably wondering why I'd been recommended to the program if I didn't even know what I should be doing, but something about him had been so distant and so different, more than usual I mean. I couldn't have felt farther from him if a wall had gone up between us right there but there were so many things obscuring him from me already. Bringing myself back to the present I sighed and went to inspect Hinata's stances and footwork.

One hour and forty-six minutes to go and a lovely heaping of homework and Demo form practice after that—why can't the Hyuuga teach their kids weapons like all the other clans? You don't have to wait until they get to Academy, really.


	4. Wednesday

**Author Note: I promised you plot development so here it is, granted it's not that much more but it's still there!…enjoy?**

**Disclaimer: I own a whole bunch of things but Naruto isn't one of them, however this story is, so don't plagiarize, I'm sure you'd think of something better anyway.**

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My breath was becoming shallower and I felt the beginnings of a headache but I tried to ignore it and kept pushing. We were so close to the ending, it would just be a few more seconds. We finished the kick combination and stepped into the last jump, an outside spinning kick. It was flawless, and we landed in perfect unison before whipping into crouching-spear-palm stances and finishing with dazzling rising-spirals—the ending flourish—all looking straight ahead.

I could hear myself almost gasping, breathing so much harder than the rest of them, but I didn't care. I was on the verge of collapsing but all that mattered at the moment was holding the precious final stance. Anko-sensei walked around us, scrutinizing us individually and searching for flaws. After another minute or so she seemed satisfied and gave us the signal to relax and there was a collective exhale as we all released ourselves and slumped over.

The team stumbled off the floor together—except for Mameha who always seemed to be graceful, and Neji who somehow managed to look dignified—towards the benches where our things were and respectively grabbed the appropriate water bottles. I felt like I was going to faint and my muscles were tearing apart but I bit back a smile. I finally had it—the entire form! I'd gotten through the entire bare-hand taijutsu form without a single mistake! I would have jumped up and down or spun around or something but then I would have died, and I would have done it while people were looking at me oddly.

I crouched down on the floor to rest and when I had finally collected enough strength, twisted open the cap to my water bottle and guzzled it down. Water never tasted so good and I'm sure I never drank it so fast before. I finished it and sighed just as there was a light clap on my shoulder, just above my sweat soaked back; it was Ryoku.

"Hey good job today," he said grinning at me toothily. "Your form looks much better."

I was still tired but I summoned a smile back, "not nearly as good as yours though." It had always been my habit to put myself down as soon as a complement was paid. Ryoku had known me forever and he was the first one to notice when I started making a conscious effort not to do it so he always tried to mess me up. He paid me ridiculous amounts of complements I couldn't possibly parry and I tried my best to volley them back.

"Yeah, you're right," he answered off handedly, and began to turn away snobbishly, but he lost the effect by cracking into wide smile. "Oh yeah! You see that Tenten? That right there is called ego!"

"And we all know yours is humongous," Hiroshi finished unenthusiastically.

Ryoku pouted for a minute and opened his mouth for a comeback but then closed it again, while Hiroshi managed to look bored smugly.

I sighed, "Oh come on Ryoku, are you serious? You totally set yourself up for that and that didn't even need a comeback."

He thought for a minute before it sunk in, "…oh, yeah…I guess you're right," he blinked a few times and glared at Hiroshi then cheerfully changed the subject.

It's moments like that which make me wonder how Ryoku ever managed to make him self into a prodigy…Hiroshi I can understand…Ryoku, well he's…'unique.'

I finished packing up my things and turned to join Ryoku and Hiroshi who were waiting by the door. Ryoku smiled at me and was grinning wickedly as he booted unsuspecting Hiroshi out the door, "ladies first," he called; clearly happy he had a belated comeback now.

"What? Are you trying to say she's not lady-like?" Neji asked with mock scorn while gesturing to me. I hadn't noticed him come up behind us and I'm sure I must have jumped a little but thankfully I didn't have to make a recovery. Ryoku had started stuttering and Hiroshi had gotten up and walked back to us, pretending to be offended for me.

"Yeah—what exactly are you trying to say? Saying I'm more lady-like than Tenten? Tenten, are you just gonna take that? I'd be pretty offened!" Hiroshi crossed his arms in feigned anger while Neji leaned over Ryoku pretending to intimidate him.

It was the only time I glimpsed a sense of humor in Neji; though at the time I was still a little too shocked to appreciate it. After a few more seconds Ryoku still didn't have a response and he apologized to me with elaborate embellishments and bowing, after which he conceded. A small smile graced Neji's lips for a moment as he walked between us when the apology had ended and clasped hands briefly with Hiroshi in triumphant solidarity.

Hiroshi was one of those rare people who had actually managed to cultivate a friendship with Neji; I wish I knew how he pulled it off.

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**Author Request: Please feed the review button; it gets fed, I get motivated, you guys get a story.**


	5. Thursday

**Author Note: for this chapter you will notice I continued not attaching the honorifics to the ends of names except for –sama, senpai and sensei, becauseit just sounds weird without them.**

**Disclaimer: see pervious.**

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It was about five or six in the afternoon when Anko-sensei finally signaled us to stop. We had been practicing in the northeast training yard outside the school since two fifteen; classes had ended early today so the Demo team could train and the other students could help with decorating and cleaning. Demo was Saturday morning starting at ten, but the foreign dignitaries would start filing in tomorrow at noon, and preparations were frantic, not just at the academy, but all over Konoha. Everything was going to be sparkling clean.

Banners and colorful lantern streams were going up all over Konoha and vendors were checking their wears and decorating their stalls, the entire city was festooned with artful arrangements of flowers and ribbons, as well as other signs of welcome. The personal touches of the Yamanaka family could be seen all over the city, their signature bouquets, wreaths, and impressive woven floral arches were everywhere and people still couldn't get enough of it. It was an amazing thing to be able to walk down street without seeing a delivery boy in the lime green jacket that meant he worked for the Yamanaka family, at least temporarily.

Demo in itself was really not meant to be a festival but it had quickly evolved into one over the years and no one protested. Our villages' merchants reaped impressive profits from the visiting families of the ninja in the kages' and daimyos' retinues and our city had a chance to show off its military strength as well as our favorable economic standing. Demo was something the entire populace benefited from and looked forward too.

And as a bonus, there wouldn't be any school tomorrow so students could help out with their families' businesses and give tours and directions to the ninja pouring in. No one really minded about helping out though, in fact they soaked up the frenzied atmosphere; we were all thrilled, it made us feel like we were really a part of the city—one big hysterically excited mob. There also wasn't any practice tomorrow so we got a day to rest before performing the whole thing. The electricity in the air was amazing and whole team was bated with nervous anticipation.

"We get an entire day to ourselves--finally!" Ryoku jumped up an down twice (though how he still had the energy to do so was beyond me) and Takashi pumped his fist in the air but Anko cut them off abruptly, "Not so fast, and this goes for everybody, I don't want you guys messing yourselves up by eating any crap tomorrow, that means nothing _fried_ and _greasy._ And no getting drunk either, I don't need you with hangovers in the morning."

"But Anko-sensei," Buka cut in, "we can't drink."

"Oh you can't drink," Anko muttered to herself quietly, "you can't drink," and then her voice became audible for everybody, "Like hell you can't drink! I bet half of you will try and buy a shot of _Tonbo_ liquor tomorrow, I know how you use your _henges_; but don't even think about it! If I catch anybody with anything stronger than draft beer tomorrow I will personally make sure that you are so traumatized you will never touch alcohol again, and I'll do that by having you spend Saturday evening with me." She grinned wickedly and stared at each one of us and we all shivered; no one even spoke again until we were sure she had gone through the building and left the Academy.

"I do not want to get on the wrong side of that." Hiroshi commented finally and the normal flow of conversation resumed.

The four of us, Hiroshi, Ryoku, Takashi, and me, were talking about what we were going to do tomorrow when Neji came over to talk to us. Yes, you read that sentence correctly, Neji actually took the initiative to walk toward somebody, _not_ past somebody; and even more surprising, he was walking towards me… (ME).

"Tenten, I need to talk to you for a moment, I have a request" he said simply.

To which I, ever articulate, replied "um…sure…okay." I followed Neji out of earshot to the edge of the training yard where a little girl jumped down out of a tree to meet us.

"Tenten, this is my cousin Hanabi-sama, Hanabi-sama this is my classmate Tenten." Neji said by means of explanation.

I looked down, Hanabi was a tiny girl; she couldn't have been more than six or seven; she had straight black hair like Neji's and piercing white eyes that seemed to see every flaw in me—suddenly, I was a lot more self conscious. She inclined her head toward me slightly and I returned the bow a little uncertainly. "We have a favor to ask of you," Neji continued, "Hanabi-sama has learned seventy-three of the eighty-one northern style weapons forms but she has had trouble finding a suitable teacher for the remaining few. We were wondering if perhaps you could show her."

I visibly stiffened as I was flooded with memories of Hinata's weapon work form just a few days ago, the trepidation that precedes teaching her on Tuesdays also came back to me. Seventy three forms was an impressive count for someone her age but I had to wonder if she had truly mastered them or if she was just able to move through them. I had only finished perfecting my forms last year; this little girl might _know_ the forms, but could she really perform them? I stared at Hanabi, she stared back and thrust her hands out toward me palms up.

"I am not my sister," she said frankly, "and I am not so inconsiderate as to ask you to teach me. I come to you because you are the best that I know and I ask you to_ show_ me the forms, whether I learn them or not is not your concern. Look at my hands, if you don't think I'm good enough or that I won't work."

Her hands were battle scared. She had the well worn marks of kunai thumb and small ruts over her knuckles from years of flipping senbon needles. The callus on her right pointer finger and the web between her finger and her thumb told me she had been practicing jian and the less significant build up on the left told me she also did spear and double swords. The palms of her hands alone told of a half dozen other weapons.

"Okay, I'll show you, I can't do it today, but I'll do it after Demo. Meet me in area thirty-three at four o'clock on Sunday." She bowed in reply to show that she accepted, but this time it wasn't a slight nod to an acquaintance. It was the bow of a student to a sensei though not a degree more.

"Thank you Tenten-sama, I will not forget you when the time is appropriate, you have done us a favor" she replied, and Neji bowed a moment too. It sounded so ominous I wasn't sure it was a good thing—but on the upside I had never seen Neji bow to anyone before except the teachers and that had to be the longest I had ever spoken to him.

It was a few more seconds before I remembered to panic about the commitment I'd just made, _way to think ahead Tenten_, I was going to be really sore on Sunday from Demo and the week of practice catching up with me in general. Why did I say Sunday?

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**Author note: sorry I took so long to update this time, I have been obscenely busy with school but I'm finally on break now, so hopefully if you all review fast I can get a new chapter up before I have to go again! Five reviews plz.**


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